Digital era has changed not only the way of communication, but also the intimacy in relationships, resulting in ever more people expressing their emotions on social networks, while avoiding direct personal contacts, as concluded at the panel session ‘A Cup of Coffee with a Psychologist’, which was held in front of a packed hall at Dorćol Platz on the topic ‘Love(s): What is love? What is the illusion of love?’.
‘The Internet should serve to make our life easier, rather than to replace the reality and provide a sense of false intimacy. Digital platforms should be our tool, rather than a stick we lean on instead of walking freely’, said the author of the collection of stories ‘Self-discipline’ Olivera Mitić. She said that it was desirable for people to take a step back to ‘analogue’, because very lonely generations were growing up who crave for real intimacy, while being in constant fear of love, and unable to open up enough to receive and give love.
‘While building honest relationships, people are paralyzed by fear of making a wrong choice, but they should not fear of that, because, in such a way they get to know themselves, they grow up emotionally. Showing emotions should not stop us from entering into relationships with other people’, said Mitić.
Playwright and founder of Mixer House Ivan Lalić thinks that it is not a good thing that people on social networks become voyeurs of their own and other people's lives and that a large number of young people are voyeurs on social networks looking for an escape from their emotions. He said that passion and dreams were a good driver in both business and love, but that new, more rational generations were coming up.
Dr Ana Đorđević, psychologist at the Institute for Philosophy and Social Theory believes that today love is increasingly romanticized and idealized and that this is the reason for many disappointments. According to her, children learn from their parents what love is, however, not through lessons, but rather through their relationship with each other, as well as through their relationship with their children.
‘We gain our true experience of love by observing the relationship between our parents and the parental intimacy we have with them. While growing up, we should learn how to love and accept ourselves, how we should give the love we were taught to our own selves. If we don't learn that, we remain lonely, alienated, we can't establish close relationships with other people’, said Ana Đorđević. Nevertheless, when a relationship or marriage is in crisis, people tend to stay in dysfunctional relationships to avoid the pain from getting out of a relationship or the pain they may inflict to the other person.
Hemofarm Foundation’s panel session ‘A Cup of Coffee with a Psychologist’, held in partnership with the Faculty of Philosophy in Belgrade and Art Commune Dorćol Platz, is a part of the
Unbreakable campaign for fighting depression and stigma.
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